People frequently say college is a time for growth, discovery, and opportunity.
And yes, it can be.
But for many of us, it’s also a time filled with overwhelming pressure, confusion, and emotional struggles.
I’m Subarna, a 19-year-old student from Nepal studying in South India.
I want to share my story, and the stories of my friends, not just as a reflection, but as a voice for many students like us who are silently dealing with mental health challenges.
So, Let’s begin.
The Reality Behind the Smiles
Mental health has become one of the biggest concerns among college students today.
According to a 2023 survey by the American College Health Association, 76% of students reported moderate to serious psychological distress.
Stress, anxiety, depression, these aren’t just words to me anymore. They’ve become part of my everyday life 🙂
These struggles don’t just affect how we feel; they affect how we perform. Over half of the students in that survey skipped classes due to mental health issues.
Many failed tests, and some, like me, even thought about giving up completely.
I’ve faced days when I couldn’t get out of bed, when I questioned my worth, and when I felt like I was carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders.
Being an International Student
Being from Nepal, I thought coming to India would be easier because of the cultural similarities.
At first, it felt okay, the campus felt like a second home. But over time, things changed. I began to feel like I didn’t belong.
There were moments when professors made jokes or comments about Nepal that weren’t just ignorant, they were hurtful. One even questioned if Nepal had engineering colleges or said Nepal is part of India.
I remember thinking, “Sir, you’re a teacher. Shouldn’t you at least know the basics?” It might sound like a small thing, but when you’re far from home and trying your best to fit in, those moments cut deep.
Feeling Alone in a Crowd
I also struggled socially. People I called my friends suddenly changed. They turned away from me. Some showed their “real face,” and it left me feeling alone.
I started sleeping too much, losing all motivation.
I felt like I was stuck. I had already paid over ₹1,70,000 for my studies (first year). Leaving would mean wasting two years. Staying felt like torture.
At 19, I found myself thinking, “Who even am I anymore?” The happiness I once had just faded. I kept everything inside until I felt like I might explode.
I’m Not Alone in This
What I went through isn’t unique. My friends here are also struggling. One of them, Satyam, feels trapped because of his family’s expectations.
He doesn’t want to disappoint them, but he’s deeply unhappy.
Another friend got admitted to the university after not getting in elsewhere, and he carries this constant feeling of being a failure.
One joined late, and that made it even harder for him to adjust.
All of us feel stuck, lost, and unheard. We try to survive in a system that doesn’t seem to care about how we feel.
The Role of Teachers
I’ve noticed how much teachers can impact our mental health (https://www.ednc.org/teachers-aware-students-mental-health/) .
When a professor is kind or supportive, it makes a huge difference. But when they are rude, insensitive, or careless with their words, it can destroy whatever confidence we have left.
Some teachers are clearly overworked or uninterested in their students’ lives. But it’s not just about teaching subjects, it’s about treating us like human beings.
Note: Its not about all teacher, some teachers are too good, the way they talk, and the way they are supportive.
Culture, Shame, and Silence
In our culture, especially in Nepal, mental health is still a taboo subject. We’re told to stay strong, stay quiet, and push through. But what do you do when you’re breaking on the inside?
Being insulted in a foreign land feels like being disrespected in your neighbor’s house.
You’re close, but not close enough to be treated like family. You feel out of place. And when you don’t have people to talk to, it becomes worse.
Financial pressure is another major stress. My family paid so much for my education, and now I’m stuck between not wanting to waste that investment and not wanting to stay in a place that’s hurting me.
What We Need
I’ve tried to cope in different ways, sleeping, writing, staying silent, or pretending I’m fine.
But that’s not enough.
We need more than just internal strength. We need real support.
We need:
- Teachers who respect your background, talk about research, innovation, and support your dreams.
- Campuses with real, accessible support, and where mental health isn’t treated like a taboo.
- Where being an international student is celebrated, not mocked or ignored.
- A place that encourages you to create, lead, and build, not just pass exams.
- People who uplift you, work with you, and inspire growth.
- With clubs, organizations, and student councils that welcome everyone, not gatekeep creativity.
For me, I just want to go back, and I don’t think I’ll ever return to India. Thank you, India, for all that you have given me.
But the sad truth is that most students don’t use the mental health resources available. And those who do often find them unhelpful.
Hope in the Dark
Even with everything I’ve gone through, I still have hope (If some-how i got the transfer to another university or college. Or if i directly transfer credit to Nepal then its too good for me).
Colleges need to step up. They need to create environments where students feel safe, respected, and supported. We aren’t just roll numbers. We are people, with stories, struggles, and dreams.
So this is me, Subarna, sharing my truth. I hope my story helps others feel less alone. And I hope the people who can make a difference start listening, really listening, to students like me.
Dear friends from Nepal, Please think carefully before coming to India. Most of your friends are going to countries like Australia, Canada, the USA, or Japan, right? You should consider the same path.
Another Note (Important Context): This doesn’t mean all Indian colleges are the same. If I talk about my principal and some other people, they were genuinely good. But the problem was with the HOD, certain faculty members, and a few students who were part of a so-called “club”.
I built something meaningful here, and one of the local students copied my idea and restarted it as their own. The leader of that group didn’t want me to be a part of club. So, i decide to didn’t join any events, or clubs, just want to completed my degree.
There are many reasons why I want to leave this college. And please, don’t just say, “You should focus on your studies.” Bro, listen, since childhood, I’ve always been someone who works on creative and initiative-based projects. If my only goal was to pass exams, why would I even try to build something bigger?
- Read this: https://www.subarnabasnet.com/four-years-in-kathmandu-my-journey-through-the-city-of-temples/
People say, “Just study and forget everything else.” but, don’t we also have the right to build, lead, and contribute, not just the local students?
Okay, bye now.